Category: Legalism

Becca’s Story

~ Bob Hayton ~ 12 Comments

I continue to hear from readers about how the story of my journey out of extreme fundamentalism has been a blessing to them.   From time to time, my readers share some of their own stories.   Recently, a young woman named Becca shared her story with me, and I received permission from her to share it with you all.   May it be a blessing and encouragement to you all.

2/12/2010

Bob,

I am twenty-three years old. I was born into a IFB family with all the fixins’. My parents were strongly KJV only; no secular music whatsoever was allowed in our household. We attended church every Sunday morning, Sunday night, and Wednesday. I was in Patch the Pirate Club. I can remember my dad railing over and over again about “secular” music, the “world’s” music, and he had books about the beat of the music causing one’s heart to beat irregularly. I am surprised I got away with wearing pants. That was a non-issue, usually, with my parents, although my mom did tell me once that she wished she’d raised me to wear skirts only. My previous pastor was once noted for having said that parents would rue the day they allowed their daughters to wear pants. I have never worn pants to a church service at that church before.

I was “saved” at the age of four. I remembered bits and pieces, but did not remember what I prayed or really remembering I was a sinner. Thus, for years upon years, even when I was in college, I doubted my salvation. What if I wasn’t really saved because I didn’t mean what I’d said at the age of four? I went off to the WILDS (summer camp) of Brevard, NC, where my counselor told me that if I couldn’t remember my salvation experience and was having doubts, then I probably wasn’t saved. I was incapacitated by fears of eternal damnation.

All of my childhood and teenage years were spent observing rules and regulation imposed by my IFB church. I knew nothing of God, but everything about what I “should” be doing. I was strongly KJV only, but I couldn’t defend my reasons behind it. I was strongly against secular music, but probably couldn’t have given reasons why. By the age of nineteen, I realized I had built concrete walls on a foundation of sand. I had no logical reason for any of the convictions I held.

When did the turnaround occur? When I went to college. My parents were hoping I’d choose PCC, but I couldn’t wear skirts all the time and it wasn’t accredited. I chose to attend Clearwater Christian, the small, accredited university on the Gulf Coast. Dad wasn’t thrilled “they allow handholding!” and a visiting evangelist had told Dad that he would never advise anyone to attend CCC. Nevertheless, I had liked what I’d seen when I visited there and it was only by the grace of God that he led me there. The school changed my life.

CCC is conservative, yes. It is fundamental. But it is not “fundamentalist,” in the derogatory sense of the word. It is Scriptural, but it couldn’t be compared to a terrorist regime in the standards it holds. At first, when I discovered that the girls I lived with had versions of the Bible that weren’t KJV, I wrote them off. Little by little, when I saw my godly Bible professors using other versions, I gave them a chance. Finally, I broke down and bought an ESV. It was also at CCC that I was truly introduced to Reformed Theology. RT had always been referred to in my circle as being not biblical or even heretical. My mom said, “I can’t accept that God would die for me and not my daughter” (my sister). I was, surprise, surprise, strongly opposed to Reformed Theology, although, once again, I could not back up my beliefs against my more knowledgeable friends. My parents and my church had raised a child with a delicate egg shell of beliefs; on the outside, the shell looked nice, but if it developed the slightest crack, the whole thing would crumble because there was no support on the interior of that shell. My ESV Bible made the clarity and the flow of the words so much clearer and cleaner; for the first time, the Bible was real to me. The more I read, the more I stumbled upon words like “chosen,” “drawn,” “gift,” “grace,” “mercy,” “God wills,” “hardens,” and the whole shebang of those words that make up the “Calvinist’s Dictionary.” I couldn’t ignore these words, however. They were there after all. I read them and reread them in context and they presented truths which I could not deny: the sovereignty of God, his mercy, his love, his ultimate glory. I walked away from reading, came back later. The truths were still there and again, they were undeniable. My professors and our chapel speakers backed up these truths and little by little, I was drawn into the beauty of Reformed Theology. When I finally accepted it fully, I was awestruck. My doubts were taken away for no longer did I need to place what little hope I had in that wimpy prayer I prayed as a four year old. My full trust was put in Christ alone. I was awakened to what “grace” really meant. I saw Christ as he really was. No longer, no longer was I entrenched in doubt, guilt out of not meeting the standard, fear of hell’s fires…. For the first time, I began learning about Christ, not about what I should be/shouldn’t be doing.

Now, as a twenty-three-year old, one year out of college, teaching, I am a full-blown Calvinist. . . .or, “Biblicist.” I attend a Reformed Presbyterian church. I wear pants to services. I have high-lighted and annotated my ESV until the pages are soft. I keep finding new references to being “drawn” to Christ. I am finding music that backs up my theology. I am reading Piper. And I have never been more in love with Christ, more on fire for Him, more wanting to scream my new-found freedom from the rooftops. When I was entrenched in the IFB circle, I was shallow, foundationless, searching, confused, disoriented. I was fully confident in nothing at all. However, by God’s grace, I have now been led into the light of His glorious Gospel, and I thank God for opening up my eyes to the truth. I wish everyone could know what I know and I am so happy to have found your site because you do know what I know; you have found what I found. Aren’t you grateful? I am.

Confessionism: Abusing 1 John 1:9

~ Bob Hayton ~ 2 Comments

I want to encourage my readers to take some time and read Jim Elliff’s recent blog post on a practice he calls “confessionism”. As a former independent fundamental Baptist, I still tend toward a legalism of sorts that stresses performance and action to a fault. And while I never reached the level of zeal and devotion Jim describes in his post, I can certainly relate to a confusion over how the requirement to confess relates with the Gospel’s free gift of salvation.

“Confessionism” takes 1 John 1:9: “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” and turns it into a general maxim for Christian living. It goes like this: confession of every known sin is required for us to experience a relationship with God and to have growth in our sanctification. This can lead one into an endless cycle of continual introspection and a zeal to remember and confess each and every known sin. What’s missing is a realization of God’s grace. Jim discusses this in depth, and explains how the context of 1 John 1:9 actually stresses the complete forgiveness we have in Christ. It is a must-read post. Go, check it out.

Of Rules and Schools

~ Bob Hayton

Over at Sharper Iron, there are some interesting discussions of the role of rules in schools. Mike Durning, in a 3 part series, argues that a heavy-handed, rules-oriented school can foster legalism. Then Aaron Blumer, site publisher, posts a 2-part series defending the validity and value of rules. My blogging friend Josh Gelatt saw in Blumer’s first post an overt legalism of sorts, and that made me jump in and read through all the articles and comments. It’s an interesting discussion but I lean more toward Josh’s assessment.

If you have time or if this topic interests you, why don’t you check out the discussion over there. Here are the links:

Legalism Versus Grace

~ fundyreformed ~ 4 Comments

I stumbled across a great blog post that relates with the theme of our last several posts: the Gospel’s work in believers. The post actually was first an article for Discipleship Journal. Let me quote a relevant portion of it here, but encourage you all to go over and read the whole thing. It’s also available as a .pdf scan from the magazine here.

Legalism is the opposite of living by grace. It is the belief that one can be justified (attain right standing with God) by following his rules. Paul addressed the error of this belief throughout the book of Galatians, explaining that it’s impossible to be right with God by obeying the law. We need grace.

Most evangelical Christians today know enough to avoid the most basic form of this error. We understand that our entrance into life in Christ””salvation””comes through faith in Christ alone, and not by keeping God’s law. Yet even when our theology of salvation is thoroughly grace-based, we can still fall into legalism. Colossians 2:6-7 says as we have received Christ we should also walk in Him, rooted and grounded in faith. That is, the way we walk in Christ should be consistent with the way we received him.

Many times, though, we fail to extend our understanding of grace and faith past the foundation of receiving Christ, to the daily matters of following him. Instead we begin to think that we stay right with God by keeping his rules. That’s what the Galatians were doing. After entering a relationship with God through grace, they thought they also needed to obey Jewish laws. Paul’s instruction to them””and all believers””is clear: just as we receive salvation by faith and grace, not by following rules, we also walk in Christ by faith and grace, not by keeping a list of commands.

Explore my other posts on gospel-centered living, and the dangers of legalism.

Announcing: Transformed by Grace

~ fundyreformed ~ 1 Comment

Some reforming fundamentalist friends of mine and I have got together and founded a new online social media site called Transformed by Grace. We are a community of former legalists and reforming fundamentalists, continually allowing God’s grace to bring us closer to Christ.

Using a free social media site provided by Ning.com, we have built a site that allows members, forums, groups, personal blog posts & pages, and lots of interaction. Think of it like a bigger Facebook group or a mini version of something like Sharper Iron. It actually has more capabilities than either Facebook or a typical forums site, and offers a lot of flexibility in how one can use it.

Our goal is to bring together other like minded reforming fundamentalists, particularly those who are familiar with the more conservative wing of Independent Baptist Fundamentalism. We hope to encourage one another, talk through remaining questions and problems, and forge relationships. And we hope to offer some help to those who are beginning their journey within fundamentalism. We want to help them learn and grow in a non-threatening environment. We don’t pressure anyone necessarily to follow a particular path out of fundamentalism, some of our founding members are happy within the IFB tent. We hope to challenge each other and grow in grace.

So, please go over and check out our site: http://reformedfundamentalism.ning.com.

Feel free to join the group or just lurk for a while. Bookmark us and come back in a few months, as I’m sure there will be more activity by then. If you have a blog that’s somewhat devoted to these issues, feel free to let us know and we’ll add it to the blogroll and possibly send some visitors your way. Above all, let us know if there’s something we can help you with. That’s what we are hoping to accomplish.