Tag: Crossway Books

Book Excerpt: Sam Crabtree on Not Rewarding Disobedience

~ Bob Hayton ~ Leave a comment

I recently finished a helpful little book on parenting by Sam Crabtree, Parenting with Loving Correction: Practical Help for Raising Young Children. In a chapter entitled “Reward Obedience, Not Disobedience” Crabtree shares the following pointed anecdote.

A friend of ours stopped by our house with her elementary school-aged son. As she stood chatting with my wife, Vicki, the boy climbed onto the back of the couch.

“Neil, get down off the couch,” the mother said.

The boy sat there unmoved as she continued to chat.

“Neil, get down off the couch,” she repeated, then kept talking with Vicki about other things.

The boy visibly stiffened his resolve. On his face and in his posture, you could see it: of all the things in the world Neil could do, he wasn’t going to get down from that couch.

The game was on.

“Neil, if you don’t get down off that couch, Sam and Vicki aren’t going to like you.”

Frankly, that’s irrelevant. To Neil, whether we like him or not was immaterial. (We like him. Years later I officiated at his wedding.)

The boy stayed put. Neil’s defiance had become the issue — not the couch, and not Sam and Vicki. The mother started digging in her purse. “Here, Neil, I’ll give you this candy bar if you get down off the couch.” When she pulled out the candy bar, he hopped down and fetched the candy bar.

Checkmate.

Mom loses.

Get this: she may think she’s rewarding him for his obedience. Actually, she’s paying him to disobey her. guess what she’s going to get lots more of?

Neil was obeying not his mother, but his sweet tooth. And the mother was catering to that….

…If you’re startled at the thought that you might actually be rewarding rebellion, whining, sassiness, and disobedience in your child, keep reading. None of us wants to be a parent that rewards the wrong thing in our child. This chapter can help you avoid that.

(p. 77-79 – italics and bold emphasis added)

The rest of the book is as on-point as the anecdote above. And while Crabtree’s diagnosis is sharp, his bedside manner is quite mild. I highly recommend his book (and hope to review it more fully later).

You can pick up a copy of this new book by Mohler from Amazon.com, Westminster Bookstore, Christianbook.com, or direct from Crossway Books.

Disclaimer: This book was provided by the publisher. I was under no obligation to offer a positive review.

Book Briefs: “This Changes Everything: How the Gospel Transforms the Teen Years” by Jaquelle Crowe

~ Bob Hayton ~ Leave a comment

It’s not often that you stumble across a book written by a teenager for teenagers — and the book is really well done. This Changes Everything: How the Gospel Transforms the Teen Years by Jaquelle Crowe is just such a rare book.

Crowe tells her own story as she prods her fellow teenage readers to follow Christ faithfully. She hits on the importance of finding value in Christ and seeing yourself as part of God’s story. She stresses the importance of belonging to a church and of striving for holiness and growth. She adds a multitude of personal anecdotes and illustrations that flesh out the nuts-and-bolts of how to live a Gospel-transformed life. The book includes graphics and charts and looks inviting. Discussion questions are included at the end of each of the chapters as well.

The Gospel does change everything, and if teenagers can grapple with that reality while they are still young — the results can be life-impacting. This book can be used with small groups and Sunday School classes, or picked up by a Christian teen who is looking for some substance to add to their faith.

I was impressed by the books Crowe quotes or mentions — all quality titles. And her reflections on Scripture and grasp of doctrine are praiseworthy. She guides the reader rightly and points the way for further study. She also demonstrates an appropriate admiration for her parents and the role they play in her faith, yet she is aware that not every reader shares her faith-filled upbringing. This is both a strength and a shortcoming, I believe. She moves in a home-school world full of Christian influence and for those in a similar world she will speak as an insider. Her message may be harder to apply to those attending public schools without a strong Christian network, unfortunately. But it is still the right message for all to hear.

I highly recommend this brief volume. I’m encouraging my own teenagers to read and interact with this book.

Disclaimer: this book was provided by the publisher for review. The reviewer was under no obligation to provide a positive review.

This book is available for purchase at the following sites: Westminster Bookstore, Christianbook.com, Amazon.com, or direct from Crossway.

About Book Briefs: Book Briefs are book notes, or short-form book reviews. They are my informed evaluation of a book, but stop short of being a full-length book review.

In the Box: New Titles from Crossway Books

~ Bob Hayton ~ Leave a comment

“In the Box” posts highlight new books I’ve received in the mail.

In this post, I want to showcase two of the new titles that at arrived at my doorstep in the last few weeks. I’m truly blessed to be able to read so many great books, and Christian publishers seem to never let up in their race to get high quality materials out the door. We are truly blessed with an abundance of Christian resources to help us in our walk with Christ.

The Love of Loves in the Song of Songs by Philip Ryken

This book is a meditation on Song of Solomon, and helpfully includes the entire biblical text (ESV) of that book. Ryken’s style is easy to read and he shares a wealth of insight from others on this fascinating (and often troubling) book. I appreciate that from the start he does not shy away from appreciating the parallels between Christ and the Church that have historically dominated the interpretation of this book, even as he rejects outright allegoricalism. He also does not eagerly proclaim the book as a manifesto on sexual liberation either, finding its instruction on marital love appropriately muted by the poetic nature of the book, and not as graphic or explicit as quite a few modern writers envision.

UPDATE: Read my review of this book here.

For more about this book, check out the book’s product page at Westminster Bookstore, Christianbook.com, Amazon or Crossway Books.

Note: This book is currently 50% off at Westminster Bookstore.

Parenting with Loving Correction: Practical Help for Raising Young Children by Sam Crabtree

The next Crossway title I received is by Pastor Sam Crabtree of Bethlehem Baptist Church in Minneapolis (where I was a member for several years). Knowing Pastor Crabtree personally, I am eager to dig into this work. Like the title of his other book Practicing Affirmation, Pastor Sam is warm and encouraging, and I expect his parental advice to be refreshing and uplifting – while also insightful.

To learn more about this book, check out the book’s product page at Westminster Bookstore, Christianbook.com, Amazon, or Crossway Books.

Note: This book is currently 40% off at Westminster Bookstore through Feb 28.