Tag: depression

Lost in a Good Footnote: How to Have Joy When You Are Hurting

~ Bob Hayton ~ 1 Comment

Have you ever read something in a footnote that was just too good to leave there? If you are like me, you can get “lost in a good footnote.” This post focuses on another great footnote.

I think that this gem buried in Joe Rigney’s book The Things of Earth: Treasuring God by Enjoying His Gifts (Crossway, 2015) is worth sharing.

Before you get to the quote, let me set the stage. Have you ever been hurting? Just completely consumed by grief or sorrow? If you remain in such a condition for long, you feel that there is no more joy in the world. The sun doesn’t seem fair, the flowers are dull, everything is meaningless. So what can you do to get yourself out of such a perilous state? This footnote has an answer.

At first it doesn’t sound like good news, but the Bible tells us that we must “rejoice with those who rejoice.” And perhaps that is the key. You have lost something, but they have not. You are hurting, but their hurt is of a lesser degree. Would you rob them of shared joy, by extending your grief to cover them too?

An others-focus may just free us from a pattern of self-despair. Looking away from ourselves, doesn’t mean we cease to grieve or hurt. But it does mean we see God at work in bigger and broader ways, with more people than just our immediate family.

This goes both ways, because we are called to “weep with those who weep.” So even our highest joys should be tinged with an awareness of the hurting of others. This is the sort of tangible togetherness and unity that should be the hallmark of Christian love and of the Church that Jesus founded.

Let me share the quote which set my mind to this direction. And please note that ultimately it is only the Holy Spirit and His work in us which enables such a radical others-orientation. May God bless all who ponder the Scripture behind the thoughts shared below.

In an earlier chapter, I spoke of the way that the Bible expands our minds by pulling us in opposite directions and that we must embrace the mystery and refuse to allow one truth to cancel out another. This is no less true of our emotional lives. One of the seemingly impossible commands in the Bible is found in Rom. 12:15: “Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep.” The gospel lays both of these commands upon us. Those who suffer are called to add their joy to the joy of the blessed. Those who receive favor must join the grieving in the midst of their sorrow. And we must do so without allowing one emotion to tyrannize the other. The glad-hearted must not lord their blessings over the afflicted. The hurting must not allow their pain to drown out real joy when it’s given from God. Love must be genuine (Rom. 12:9), and we must endeavor to live in harmony with one another (Rom. 12:16). Practically speaking, this means that our lives will be characterized by the same heart as the apostle Paul, who lived “as sorrowful, yet always rejoicing” (2 Cor. 6:10). It also means that wisdom and propriety will govern our joy and sorrow, so that we move with the rhythms of Eccles. 3:4: “[There is] a time to weep, and a time to laugh.” And the only way that we’ll make any progress in getting these rhythms right is if we are open and honest in communicating with one another and if we are trusting in the grace of God to be sufficient for our every need. It is grace that enables the sorrowful to rejoice in the joy of others, especially when they receive something that we desperately want or have tragically lost. It is grace that enables the joyful to bear with the suffering of the grief-stricken, especially when our hearts are bursting with gladness. Grace must reign, love must cover a multitude of sins, wounds, and thoughtlessness, and Christ must do what is impossible for us.

— Endnote 13 from chapter 11, found on pg. 259.

Pick up a copy of this book at Amazon, or Westminster books.

Book Briefs: “Spurgeon’s Sorrows: Realistic Hope for those who Suffer from Depression” by Zack Eswine

~ Bob Hayton ~ 2 Comments

Spurgeon's Sorrows by Zack EswineChristianity is a religion of the heart, and Evangelicalism especially emphasizes personal conversion and spiritual transformation. Our churches are very good at diagnosing spiritual maladies and confronting the problem of personal sin. But we often stumble in our efforts to help those afflicted by mental anguish, physical suffering and especially depression.

Depression directly contradicts the emotions that Scripture commends, and even commands. We are to “rejoice always” and to “count it all joy.” So a common temptation is to chalk up depression to the category of self-inflicted pain and ultimately reduce it to a sin problem. The conservative tendency to distrust psychologists and especially psychiatrists only adds to the problem.

Author Zack Eswine comments on this tendency:

Religion offers both a challenge and a help to those who suffer mental disorders. This challenge surfaces when preachers assume that depression is always and only a sin. They pour gasoline on the fire and wonder why it rages rather than calms those they try to help. At the same time, studies today confirm that those with mental health challenges simply do much better if they are part of a religious community. (Kindle location, 495)

This contemporary problem is not so contemporary after all. Charles Spurgeon the great Baptist preacher of the nineteenth century, was all too intimately acquainted with this problem. Eswine explores this little known side of the great preacher in his new book Spurgeon’s Sorrows: Realistic Hope for those who Suffer from Depression (Christian Focus, 2014). Spurgeon himself suffered from persistent bouts of depression. He sought medical treatment and at times took sabbaticals to restore his health. He was also never shy about admitting this problem, and his candor led him to be a magnet for those seeking help themselves.

Eswine’s book traces Spurgeon’s history and his approach to discussing this problem and counseling those with the problem. Spurgeon’s own personal thoughts and experience shed’s light on that of many in today’s church.

Eswine writes with care and resists a simplistic approach to the problem. He doesn’t shy away from spiritual considerations either. Spurgeon himself was like that. At times he spoke with great compassion of those afflicted by sorrows and despair, and at other times he challenged them toward greater faith. We are both physical and spiritual beings and no counsel is a one-size-fits-all solution.

Even the darkest pits that depression can lead to were roads travelled by the preacher. He found solace in Elijah and Job and others who like him, had despaired of life and wished to die. Eswine quotes Spurgeon and crafts his book with care, trying to help the wounded and encourage them to find hope in a body of believers.

The book is a bit disjointed and segmented. But that seems intentional, and is written with an eye to what those suffering from depression can withstand. Short chapters, brief thoughts, simple conclusions and applications. Encouraging thought and offering help without a judgemental attitude. One oddity in the book is the author’s repeated use of Spurgeon’s first name. This may be intended to be less off-putting for the depressed reader. It might make “Charles” seem more approachable. I found it jarring and odd, but that may just be me!

There is much that caregivers can learn as well in these pages, and the author’s use of Spurgeon’s insights along with some contemporary authors, provides help in how to deal with those struggling with this problem in our churches today. I recommend the book and hope its message is a blessing and help to many.

Pick up a copy of this book at any of the following online retailers: Amazon, Westminster Bookstore, ChristianBook.com, or direct from Christian Focus.

Disclaimer: This book was provided by the publisher for review. The reviewer was under no obligation to offer a positive review.

About Book Briefs: Book Briefs are book notes, or short-form book reviews. They are my informed evaluation of a book, but stop short of being a full-length book review.

Big Sale on Minibooks from CCEF and New Growth Press

~ Bob Hayton

New Growth Press has a special sale running now through Friday, Aug. 31 (5pm EST) on their excellent minibooks (many of them produced by the Christian Counseling and Education Foundation). I have reviewed some of these minibooks before, and was very impressed with them. These books are Gospel-centered and extremely practical. They help the average church goer connect the life-changing power of the Gospel with their life problems. Topics include dealing with divorce, singleness, pornography, anger, depression and more.

Here is another endorsement of these books:

Our church displays these minibooks so that people can begin to connect their personal struggles, whether sin or suffering, to the power of the Gospel. While these books clearly reveal the realities of living in a fallen world, they also lead people to the living hope found in Jesus and give a clear framework for living both wisely and compassionately. We hope the books serve as a first step as people seek help and more specific counsel from the body of Christ, whether from a pastor, small group leader or friend. I highly recommend these materials. They have been very helpful in my own counseling ministry over the years. ~ Jim Bates, Associate Pastor, Faith Reformed Presbyterian Church (Quarryville, PA)

There are 77 books in all, and they are available for $2.50 each (regularly $3.99), and all of their five-packs are available for $9.99 (regularly $15.99). Be sure to take advantage of this special offer! Hurry, the sale ends Friday, Aug. 31 at 5pm Eastern time.

“Christians Get Depressed Too” by David P. Murray

~ Bob Hayton ~ 3 Comments

Today’s Church has been beset with numerous challenges. Few have been so distressing as the problem of depression. Good people are weighed down with their own depression or perplexed about that of friends and family members. In some sectors of the Church, this is complicated by a stigma associated with depression. Sin ultimately causes depression, it is assumed. And the conclusion follows that good Christians don’t get depressed.

To counter these notions about depression, David P. Murray has written an incredibly helpful book entitled, Christians Get Depressed Too. Murray, Professor of Old Testament and Practical Theology at Puritan Reformed Theological Seminary, has encountered depression in ministry and personal contexts enough to be both well versed on the topic and sensitive to the need for sound resources. The book he has written is intentionally short: since “depressed people cannot read hundreds of pages.” (pg. xi). It serves as a resource for caregivers as well as a source of hope for the depressed who consciously decide they want to get better.

Murray explains what depression is and what it signifies. He counters the approach which assumes as a default that behind most bouts of depression lie hidden sin problems. The picture is much more complex than that, he claims. He exposes the faulty thinking patterns which often contribute to depression, and finds examples of such thinking, and even the depression which results, in the lives of people in Scripture. In defense of the physiological nature of much of depression, Murray appeals to Puritans such as Richard Baxter.

On the role of medicine, Murray finds two unhelpful extremes: too much dependence on medicine, and the aversion of any use of it at all. Along these lines, he says:

Treating a depressed person with medication is often no different from giving my eight-year-old daughter one of her many daily injections of insulin for diabetes. I am not merely alleviating symptoms, but addressing the cause–depleted insulin due to dying or dead cells in her pancreas. And if she is lethargic, weepy, or irrational due to low sugar levels, I do not ask her what commandments she has broken or what “issues of meaning and relationship” she has in her life. I pity her, weep for her, and thank God for His gracious provision of medicine for her. (pg. 64-65).

This is not to say, Murray merely refers Christians suffering from depression to their local psychiatrist. Rather, he offers an abundance of help from the Scriptures on how to correct thinking patterns and learn to receive even depression as a gift from God’s very hand. He points to a little remembered passage where Scripture says, “God left” Hezekiah, “that he might know all that was in his heart” (2 Chron. 32:31). Murray elaborates:

This is not an objective leaving, but a subjective leaving. God withdrew Himself from Hezekiah’s spiritual feelings so that he lost his sense of God’s presence, protection, and favor… But God had a wise and loving purpose in this…. Sometimes… [God] may wisely, temporarily, and proportionately withdraw the sense of His favor and presence to remind us of our state without Him and to lead us to greater thankfulness and appreciation for Him. He may do this… by lovingly afflicting our brain, disrupting it’s chemistry and electricity, just as He does when He lovingly afflicts one of His dear children with epilepsy, or any other disease. (pg. 65).

This small book of 120 or so small-sized pages, will prove an immense help to both caregivers and those suffering from depression. It is a primer on depression and in it, Murray offers a careful list of recommended resources, for those looking to continue their study of this topic. The book’s attractive cover, and handy, almost “pocket” size, make it an ideal book to giveaway to friends dealing with this issue. I’ve already loaned or given out copies of this inexpensive book, and plan on using this as a resource for years to come.

You can read purchase a copy of this book from any of these fine retailers: Westminster Bookstore, Christianbook.com, Amazon.com or direct from Reformation Heritage Books.

Music Mondays: “Desert Song” by Brooke Fraser

~ Bob Hayton ~ 1 Comment

Music Monday posts highlight the music which touched my heart on Sunday. I pray the message of these songs will help us all to live in the spirit of Worship all week long.

Two Sundays ago I heard this song for the first time. It followed a heartfelt, God-centered, prayer by a man whose wife only has weeks to live. Perhaps it was the juxtaposition of this song following the prayer of that man that made it so meaningful to me. It speaks of why we can praise God even in hard times. If you’re like me, you’ve had a few hard times yourself. May this song minister to you like it did to me.

Desert Song

Words & Music by Brooke Fraser
Arranged by Joel Mott

This is my prayer in the desert
When all that’s within me feels dry
This is my prayer in my hunger and need
My God is the God who provides

This is my prayer in the fire
In weakness or trial or pain
There is a faith proved of more worth than gold
So refine me Lord through the flame

Chorus:
I will bring praise, I will bring praise
No weapon formed against me shall remain
I will rejoice, I will declare
God is my victory and He is here

This is my prayer in the battle
When triumph is still on its way
I am a conqueror and co-heir with Christ
So firm on His promise I’ll stand

Bridge:
All of my life
In every season
You are still God
I have a reason to sing
I have a reason to worship

This is my prayer in the harvest
When favour and providence flow
I know I’m filled to be emptied again
The seed I’ve received I will sow.

 ©2008 Hillsong Publishing (Admin. in U.S. by Integrity’s Hosanna! Music)

You can listen to the entire song by watcing this video clip. There’s also a touching story surrounding the song, one of the performers (or possibly the author??) had just lost a premature baby. The song gave her strength to make it in that tough time.

The song is also available for a free listen at rhapsody.com. Sheet music can be previewed (and purchased) easily at this link. I also stumbled across many comments about the song and its impact at this link.

Finally, this song is a Hillsong production, and is showcased on their This is Our God CD. You can pick up a copy at Amazon.com. Learn more about Hillsong, at hillsongmusic.com.