Tag: sex

“Living in the Light: Money, Sex and Power” by John Piper

~ Bob Hayton ~ 1 Comment

Living in the Light: Money, Sex & Power by John PiperThe title of one of John Piper’s latest books is direct and confrontational, yet inviting at the same time: just like the man John Piper himself. Living in the Light: Money, Sex and Power (The Good Book Company, 2016) comes with a similarly direct yet inviting sub-title: “Making the most of three dangerous opportunities.” The book lives up to its title. It is both warning and invitation, in short it is John Piper challenging us to live to God’s glory in these three areas.

Piper explains that these three areas in themselves are not evil, they are God’s gifts to us. He defines them as follows:

  • Power is a capacity to pursue what you value.
  • Money is a cultural symbol that can be exchanged in pursuit of what you value.
  • Sex is one of the pleasures that people value, and the pursuit of it.

(Living in the Light, p. 20)

He then looks to Romans 1 and the “great exchange” whereby man in his fallen state turns created things to idols and refuses to worship God. In our fallen state, we pursue sex and other things as means to their own ends – as a worship of self or other created things in opposition to God. Money is a status symbol, and power is self-exaltation. They represent real danger and Piper spares no punches in warning and unpacking the biblical warnings related to the unfettered pursuit of money, sex or power.

In contrast to the worldly way of using these things, redemption puts God in the proper place. Piper uses the analogy of the sun and planets. When the sun is in the proper place, the planets of money, sex and power line up in their proper spheres and complement our lives in ways God intended. When we bring one of those planets into a central place, life is out of order and God is spurned.

Piper does a good job explaining why and how each of these elements are properly to be enjoyed:

Money exists so that it will be plain by the way we use it that God is more to be desired than money. Sex exists so that it will be plain that God is more to be desired than sex. And power exists so that it will be plain that admiring and dependeing on his power is more to be desired than exalting our own.

p. 102

In all of this, Piper displays his pastoral burden to rein in Western Christians who are so pulled away from the centrality of the Son, by the gravity of the competing planets: money, sex and power. Yet at times he is too God-focused and too strong in his formulations. As in the quote above, I think sex is more than just something to be partaken of in light of God being better than sex. Same with money. God “richly provides us with everything to enjoy” (1 Tim. 6:17) and Piper’s arguments sometimes seem to downplay the goodness of earthy pleasures. (For a great complement to Piper’s call desire God chiefly, look at Joe Rigney’s The Things of Earth: Treasuring God by Enjoying His Gifts, Crossway, 2014).

This quibble aside, this book is a clear and passionate call to live for Christ in today’s sex-crazed and money-obsessed culture. We could all do with a dose of John Piper challenging us to a more Godward focus in this day and age! I highly recommend this short book. It would make for a great small group or Sunday School resource, although it does not come with discussion questions.

Consider picking up the book at Amazon, Westminster Bookstore, Christianbook.com, or direct through The Good Book Company.

Disclaimer: This book was provided by The Good Book Company. I was under no obligation to offer a favorable review.

“When Sinners Say ‘I Do’ DVD” by Dave Harvey

~ Bob Hayton ~ 1 Comment

When Sinners Say I Do DVD by Dave HarveyMedia Details:
• Speaker: Dave Harvey
• Director: Patrick Gines
• Publisher: Shepherd Press (2014)
• Format: DVD
• Run Time: 195 minutes
• ISBN/ASIN#: 1633420922
• List Price: $59.99 (sale at Shepherd Press for $39.95)
• Rating: Must Watch

Blurbs:
“Dave Harvey skillfully exposes the real root of most marriage problems — each spouse is still a sinner. But he doesn’t leave us to wallow in our sin. He shows the way out through the ongoing power of the gospel. This will be helpful for any married couple whether they’ve been married five weeks or fifty years.”
—Jerry Bridges, Author of the Pursuit of Holiness

“Listen closely as Dave Harvey teaches on the struggles that characterize all marriages. His words are clear and inviting. He says it in a way that is fresh and humble. He cuts to the heart of what all of us are like—people needing daily, freely-given mercies from the Lord. And he cuts to the heart of what all of us need—not self-help, not a pep talk, not a few tips, but an active Savior. Listen, take to heart, and you will grow wiser as a husband or wife.”
—David Powlison, Executive Director, CCEF; Senior Editor, Journal of Biblical Counseling

“There is no laboratory for the grace of God like the family home. And there is no relationship so crucial to the work of grace in our homes as our marriages. It’s for these reasons I’m so grateful for Dave Harvey’s careful, wise, and relevant teaching in When Sinners Say I Do. Watch closely with your spouse or spouse-to-be, and let Dave lead you with great experience and pastoral care through the hard places of marriage right into the very throne room of God, where you both will find abundant grace for every need you have from now until your nineties.”
—Jared C. Wilson, Director of Content Strategy, Midwestern Seminary; TGC Blogger, The Gospel-Driven Church

Review:
Marriage is under attack today from all sides. Churches are being pressured to recognize marriages between people of the same gender. Our culture insists on “divorce on demand.” Even in conservative evangelical churches it seems that marriages have never been more unstable. Christians are getting divorced at alarmingly high rates.

Solutions to our dilemma abound. There are countless counseling resources and video series aimed at spicing up your marriage, learning the right “love talk,” or trying increasingly bizarre sexual practices as a way to keep our marriages vibrant.

Dave Harvey points out what should be obvious. The problem with marriages lasting comes down to one simple point. Marriage always involves 2 people and both of them are sinners! His book When Sinners Say “I Do” has helped many Christian couples. Now Shepherd Press has released an 8 part video series in an effort to equip the church with Dave’s important message.

This DVD series showcases Pastor Harvey walking through different passages of Scripture and unpacking the Gospel message that applies to our marriages. He emphasizes that sin is often at the root of relational conflict. He stresses the complementary design of God for man and woman. He preaches contentment and the role of mercy. He talks frankly about sex as God’s gift for each spouse – to be mutually enjoyed. And he points to the power for change: God’s stubborn grace.

The sessions are between 20 and 30 minutes long and focus just on Dave and his message. I appreciate this length as it allows the DVD series to be used both in SS classes and small group settings, or even as a seminar or workshop for a marriage retreat. The shorter time allows for questions and interaction by a local pastor or teacher who leads a group of couples through this material. Included with the video is a link to a .PDF study guide which can accompany the DVD and facilitate group discussion.

The series is appropriate for single adults as well, and they are from time to time addressed. It is also helpful for both older and younger couples — he speaks to the needs of both. In his talk on sex, Harvey is careful to be discreet and yet still direct.

The sessions do not major on the psychology of marriage. More time is devoted to unpacking and applying God’s word and then drawing application to marriage. Harvey’s advice is seasoned with years of ministry experience. He brings appropriate and helpful illustrations to capture the attention of the audience. And his insights are powerful and helpful. People in a variety of backgrounds and situations in life will benefit from this series.

I can’t wait to share this in a group setting – either with our small group or a church SS class. I hope this gains a wide audience and encourages many a couple with Gospel grace for their marriage.

Sample:
See six preview clips here, or watch the introduction below.

About the Speaker:
Dave Harvey serves as the Pastor of Preaching at Four Oaks Community Church in Tallahassee, FL. He serves as the Chairman of the board of the Christian Counseling and Educational Foundation (CCEF), as well as the Chairman of the Board of the Sojourn Network. He is the author of a number of books, including Am I Called, Rescuing Ambition, and When Sinners Say “I Do.” Dave lives in Tallahassee, Florida with his wife, Kim. They have four grown children.

Where to Buy:
• Amazon
• ChristianBook.com
• direct from Kregel

Disclaimer:
This DVD was provided by the publisher for review. The reviewer was under no obligation to offer a positive review.

Q & A: What About the Arguments against CCM?

~ Bob Hayton ~ 103 Comments

From time to time I get asked various questions through my blog contact form. I don’t always have time to respond. Sometimes, the question and my response seem appropriate to share with my wider blog audience. So I’ll begin a feature on my blog addressing reader’s questions. If you have any questions you would like me to consider for this feature, just contact me.

Reader’s Question:

I have read through your posts and the comments on music. I have found it very helpful as I have grown up with the fundamentalist view on music and it is extremely hard to shake. I have broadened my musical tastes, though, and have grown to be blessed by much of “ccm” and find it very God-honoring.

I know you are not an expert on the music debate but you have written much about it on this blog and have changed your own view point from the conservative to less so. Because of that I was wondering if you could answer a question I have. I feel like I can biblically counter much of the arguments thrown at me that condemn CCM. The one thing I have not yet been able to find an answer for is the argument that the beginnings of rock and roll as stated by those artists who wrote it was rebellion and illicit sex. I can say from my own experience that I am not driven to those things when listening. But I would be told that is personal experience and that that is a poor judge of truth. Their argument would be that the music itself is inherently rebellious and sensual as stated by even those who wrote it. I am curious as to if you have faced that and what you answer would be to that. It is hard to find people who I can discuss this with where I am currently so I appreciate your taking the time to read this and answer.

My Answer:

Great question. For starters, it should be said that fundamentalists don’t have a universal approach to music. I’ve experienced fundamentalist churches that utilize CCM music, or close to it, in their services but still preach from the KJB. Many fundamentalist and conservative evangelical churches shy away from using CCM music in public worship, but don’t have as big of a problem with people listening to that music for entertainment or personal edification. But I came from a wing of fundamentalism that was very anti-CCM and that marshaled the very arguments you shared in your question, so I’ll try to share how I would respond.

I should also state that I prefer CCM music for my personal music listening. I don’t like everything I hear equally, but I would rather focus on God in my music than listen to just secular music. Not all Christian music is created equal in its emphasis on a clear, Christ-focused lyrics and a melody and rhythm that complement that. But a lot does. Our church too, uses a blended form of worship where we sing older hymns as well as contemporary songs and choruses. Last week I led the worship at our church and we sang “Nothing but the Blood” and “Holy, Holy, Holy” right alongside “Revelation Song”, and “Worthy is the Lamb“. We also sang
“Before the Throne of God Above“. We had an acoustic guitar, a keyboardist and an electric drum-set. Some songs the drums bowed out completely. (I help serve in a church plant, so we don’t have a permanent home – hence no piano).

Regarding the origins of rock and roll, I think you could say at one time the aura of rock and roll was all about sex. But that has changed over time. Tchaikovsky, along with other composers of classical music, had a horrendous personal story filled with homosexuality and aberrant behavior. Tchaikovsky’s music was described as “vulgar” and “supersensous”. But that stigma hasn’t survived to this day. So the association that rock and roll had with sex is something that can change over time. There was an association with free love and rebellion, too. But today it is just an art form. It’s something that plays at the dentist’s office and grocery store, not just at large, sexually-charged concerts.

Music without lyrical content, lacks the ability to communicate with specificity apart from cultural factors. A minor key means something sad to our culture, but something happy to others. When music is coupled with lyrics, then it has the ability, as a whole, to communicate with a degree of specificity that lets us judge it morally and accept or reject it.

There’s also the testimony you share about how you respond to CCM. It isn’t just an emotional response. There is a biblical principle that if you look at the fruits of something, you can know its character. The fruit in my life and my church of the best of CCM music with it’s God-ward focus, has been positive spiritual growth, not a tendency to carnality and sensuality.

I will also say that a person’s previous associations or personal prejudices will make it hard to adopt the style of CCM music for their own use. It can anyway. But for me, the music of 100+ years ago was just as sentimental and emotionally driven as today’s CCM. But the difference is I don’t respond to that, because it isn’t music of my generation. CCM does communicate and resonate with me powerfully, and has the ability to engage my whole being — emotions and heart and mind — in the power of the song. And that ability is something that CCM is using for good. I still think more emphasis on other emotions beyond praise and joy are needed in CCM music and music in the Church today. We need to bring back lament and Psalm-singing somehow. But I’m thankful for the blessing that CCM has brought to the church, particularly with the modern hymns and content-rich songs.

I’m sure my readers might be able to pipe in here and add their own thoughts. So, please take the time to share your thoughts here for the benefit of the one who asked the question, as well as to contribute to the conversation here for everyone’s benefit.

“A Sweet and Bitter Providence: Sex, Race, and the Sovereignty of God” by John Piper

~ Bob Hayton ~ 1 Comment

Few books or stories in the Bible match the grandeur and evocative power of the Book of Ruth. It may be one of the best stories from a literary perspective, of all time. John Piper has skillfully unpacked the beauty of this literary masterpiece in a beautifully produced work of his own.

A Sweet and Bitter Providence traces the story of Naomi and Ruth through tragedy and despair and on to grace and joy. Before I can even talk about Piper’s writing I have to stop and point out how beautiful and attractive this book is. The sleeve is beautiful enough, with a first rate painting of Ruth from the Bridgman art gallery. Then the hardcover has the same beautiful image on the front with a detailed map of Israel on the back in soft whites and gray. The sleeve contrasts the white and gray with a bold maroon. Such a beautiful packaging will help draw the reader in to the glory of the Book of Ruth.

The book is divided into four chapters that match up with the four chapters in Ruth. Before each chapter the biblical text in the ESV is provided. This allows the book to serve as a devotional alongside the reading of the Biblical book of Ruth. Piper adds an introduction and “final appeals” on either side of the four main chapters.

As the subtitle indicates, several themes are addressed throughout Ruth which have contemporary significance. Piper highlights the sexual chastity and bold assessment of character displayed by Boaz and Ruth (with Naomi). He highlights the racial aspects of a despised and destitute Moabitess’ return to Israel with her Jewish mother-in-law. The predominant focus is on the sovereignty of God clearly seen by the characters in the story as well as the author of Ruth. God is sovereign over both the bitter providential suffering of Naomi, as well as the beautiful and gracious provision of a redeemer and an heir.

Piper doesn’t miss the author’s intentional way of setting the story in the larger framework of canonical history. The book ends by declaring Ruth to be the great-grandmother of David.

The final appeals Piper offers sound like the wise advice of a seasoned man of God. Perhaps listing them here will encourage you to pick up this little book and by it be awakened afresh to the wonder of God’s sovereignty and the glory found in the small book of Ruth.

Piper exhorts us to:
1)Study the Scriptures
2)Pursue Sexual Purity
3)Pursue Mature Manhood and Womanhood
4)Embrace Ethnic Diversity
5)Trust the Sovereignty of God
6)Take the Risks of Love
7)Live and Sing to the Glory of Christ

This little book will do much to infuse your soul with worship to our Lord and Savior. It will also call you to a greater trust and deeper obedience. I recommend it highly.

Pick up a copy of this book from Westminster Bookstore, Amazon.com, Christianbook.com, or direct from Crossway.

Disclaimer: This book was provided by Crossway Books for review. The reviewer was under no obligation to offer a favorable review.

Christian Counseling Booklets from CCEF

~ Bob Hayton ~ 5 Comments

The Christian Counseling and Educational Foundation is an excellent resource for a Scriptural-based approach to life’s problems. Their motto is “Restoring Christ to counseling, and counseling to the Church.” I have found their materials to be gospel-centered and grace-oriented. They are an incredible help to the church.

CCEF through its publishing arm, New Growth Press, makes available a wide range of booklets that address a host of common problems. I am going to highlight a few of these booklets in this post.

The booklets are sensitive to the life-situation they address, yet also apply the Bible and particularly the Gospel to the problem. I highly recommend them.

Single and Lonely: Finding the Intimacy You Desire by Jayne Clark.

This booklet explores how loneliness, which plagues single young people as much as it does the elderly, sick and widowed, is connected to the gospel. Protecting yourself, and aiming for one or two close friendships usually backfires. Recognizing our acceptance and love found in Christ, we should instead pursue wholeness and healing in a community of Christ-lovers. Practical steps for recognizing and dealing with the problem of loneliness in oneself and others are also included.

You can preview the booklet here, and purchase it directly from CCEF or from Westminster Bookstore.

Sex Before Marriage: How Far is Too Far? by Timothy Lane.

A counseling booklet with that title would scare me. But that’s the kind of question on many people’s mind. The booklet begins by rooting advice in a biblical view of sex. It’s wonderful and its a big deal, not something flippant or light. It goes on not so much as to prescribe boundaries but to expose heart issues and motivations. It admits chastity will look different in different cultures and times, but it gives an overarching principle: “Don’t act like you are married when you are not!” It draws a line and recommends no romantic or involved physical touching, let alone other questionable acts. It shifts the focus to marriage and will lead the conscientious reader right in this difficult arena.

You can preview the booklet here, and purchase it directly from CCEF or from Westminster Bookstore.

Find more of these helpful booklets here, or check out their mini book subscription program.